I had an idea today (yeah, I know, scary).
What if I got someone to take ORACLENERD T-Shirts to Oracle OpenWorld and sold them there, on site? It would help me by getting the word (and the t-shirt) out, and it could help you as I would split any profit with you.
Not sure if it could be done or if anyone would be willing to do it...but hey, desperate times calls for desperate measures. If you are at all interested, let me know.